Wedding of the Year Part 1

The church began to fill up quickly with family and friends. Mom was in her usual pink gown, and she stood next to one of my brothers.

“I take you, Savannah Rachel Plumb, your Irish temper, your wanderlust, your children, your parents, your brothers, and your crazy mixed up life – to be all mine.

Savannah, the day you were reported missing in Egypt was the day I realized that not only did I love you but that I was in love with you, and that I had to do everything in my power to let you know of that. And now we are here, about to become a family.

Savannah, from this day forward I promise you these things. I will laugh with you in times of joy and comfort you in times of sorrow. I will share in your dreams, and support you as you strive to achieve your goals. I will listen to you with compassion and understanding, and speak to you with encouragement. I will remain faithful to our vows for better or for worse, in times of sickness and health. You are my best friend and I will love and respect you always.” He slipped the band on my finger.

Was this really happening? I tried not to cry…

After his vows I couldn’t even say what I’d written, so I made up new ones on the fly. “I, Savannah Rachel Plumb, take you, Andrew Cheesman, to be my husband and partner in crime, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, for even poorer when I've been traveling a lot, in sickness and in health, as long as we both shall live, till the Reaper shows up to claim us.”

“You can’t call me all those names anymore,” Andy joked, “if I’m taking yours.”

“You’re still cheesy to me. That isn’t gonna change because we’re married.”

Wedding Preps, Part 2

“You nervous about wedding?” Halima asked me over the noon meal.

Halima didn’t talk much because of her limited Simlish, but her question took me by surprise.

I hadn’t thought too much about the wedding, actually. The whole thing was just second nature. Sunday was the only day both Andy and I had off from our jobs, and the kids weren’t in school. It was the only day we could do it.

Halima grew up in a very traditional Muslim family. Her mother stayed at home while her father worked. She and her husband Yusuf had planned to travel the world and get to know other cultures, but he unfortunately passed away.

I put out an advertisement in an Al Simhara newspaper and on the internet for a personal housekeeper and nanny, and someone with the ability to speak Arabic was a plus. Halima answered my ad.

Andy and Halima went over to the wedding chapel that had been built over on Oak Grove to make sure everything was copacetic.

Ari, bless her maid-of-honor heart, brought my kids into the chapel. Sebastian came in right behind them.

“So. Today is the day.”

“I guess it is.”

“What do you mean, you GUESS today is the day? Everything’s ready. The flowers, the food, the guests, the music…”

I took a deep breath. “Something’s missing.”

I heard a set of footsteps running up the aisle, and shook my head… ahhhh, dad.

“I wrote my own vows,” he told me, fumbling adorably through his words. “But truthfully I don’t need them. The only vow I need is you in my arms.”

To be continued….

Wedding Preps, Part 1

 

I got yet another speaking engagement, this time at the business office.  I’m now commanding a thousand simoleans an hour just to talk, and, if you haven’t noticed, I’m pretty good at it. 

 

I arrived at the office at nine-thirty and spoke for three hours.  If you do the math, that’s three thousand simoleans.  With a wedding to plan, I gladly accepted my payment.  As Cheesebreath always says, weddings aren’t cheap, but in my case, as long as my dad is willing to pony up, they can always be a little bit less expensive. 

After leaving the business office I had an appointment with mom’s stylist – whaddya know, she arranged it.  I could have done without the visit but, as Ari says, she figured it was an opportunity for some mother-daughter bonding before the big day. 

 

“When Mrs. Plumb was here last she told me she had a daughter who was getting married.”

“Really.”

“I assume you’re the daughter.”

“Guilty.”

There was a brief pause.  Then she said, “She practically gushed about you in the chair.  ‘Savannah is so beautiful, so special, so wonderful and accomplished.’  She said she was treating you to a pre-wedding makeover.”

My mother said that?

“Does my butt look too big in these jeans?” I asked her. 

“Of course not,” she replied.  “You know, you have a great body. You should definitely be a model.  It’s clear that you work out and your curves are in the right places.  I just think you need something – something that accentuates all of this.” 

My mother is delusional if she thinks I’m going to stand around while someone takes pictures of me. 

 

The stylist put me in this purple & green silk coat.  Now it certainly isn’t my taste.  But when I made a one-off red-eye to China to promote my book, I got raves about it. 

On Pinochle Pond

I can’t believe it’s happened. I live here, at the very end of Pinochle Pond, in a house that is tailor made for a nature lover. Andy picked the location.

And to boot, my precious cuties are home with me, getting off the school bus. It’s funny, they now go to the same school I went to.

This is Halima Meshkenet. She’s Egyptian. I hired her for one specific purpose – to watch the kids when Andy and I can’t. She’s also there to help with the language barrier, as the kids’ Simlish is still very limited. They are native Arabic speakers and so is Halima. My own Arabic isn’t great but I’m learning.

Andy’s ideal with the kids. Our first morning back from Egypt, Halima fixed waffles and he and Satis ate at the table.

Satis is a bit shy around everyone except for me. She’s not outgoing like her brother, so she pretty much sticks to the house. I dealt with yet another publisher’s deadline. My contract is for three books…

Pretty soon it was time to put down the laptop and suit up for work. I had the strangest assignment ever. It was bad enough that I had a poltergeist invasion, pretty much the worst I’d seen so far…

After zapping a haunted desk…

I looked outside and saw the strangest thing….haunted…get ready for this… seeds.

I’ve done a lot of traveling, been all over the world, fought mummies in tombs in Egypt, but this is hands down the strangest thing I’ve ever seen.

I took out my Banshee Blaster and carefully (how can you zap possessed kernels out of existence?) sucked the poltergeist from the particles.

Funny thing is, I didn’t even think to pick the darn things up when I finished zapping them. I left them where they were.

After the kids and Halima had gone to bed, Cheesebum and I got a moment to ourselves.

Egypt sweet Egypt

 

A few days later, Andy and I made the trek to Egypt to bring back Imsety and Satis.  I didn’t care what customs told me, I was going to bring them home before my wedding. 

Poor Andy really isn’t into this Egypt thing.  I had him running to the marketplace to hunt for Samir (the kids’ father) and then he was called to go into a cave to fetch something, took a wrong turn, and got burnt.  I showed him this dive well where he could douse himself.  He had to change his clothes tho.  Oh well. Comes with the territory. 

Meanwhile, after we both came out of the cave, I found Samir and had a few words for the bastard.  Apparently he’d gotten himself ‘promoted’ to special merchant.  Either the kindly old man who was there died of old age or got offed by Samir and his henchmen. 

The first thing I did was show him the paperwork from the court decision that remanded custody of the children to me.  “I appeal this,” he said in his broken Simlish.

“No matter what you do,” I told him, “the courts are going to side with me.”

“I pay you one million simoleans – and you never hear from me again.”

“You haven’t got enough money to buy me off.  I’m not for sale.  And neither are those children.  I have custody now and they’re coming home with me.”

The Lovesick Burglar

I had a nasty surprise when I came home from work. 

When I heard the door creak open I got up to see what was going on.

I got downstairs…

Sure enough it was a burglar, and not only did he try to rob my house, with my parents, my fiancé, my brother and my nephew asleep upstairs, but he had the gall to try to hit on me.  “Sorry, pal, I’m taken,” I told him. 

When I saw him headed for my hard-earned treasures in the museum, I decided to attack.  Good thing I’ve been working out. 

By the time I called the police, he was done for. 

I read the name on his badge, Stacey Sanchez.  Seriously… Stacey???

“You do realize that by taking this guy on you put yourself and everyone around you in danger.  He is a dangerous criminal.”

Yeah, and I’m a renowned adventurer.  Humph!  I thought. Didn’t you read my book you dolt?  A cute dolt but a dolt nonetheless.   It pained me to keep mum, but I had to.

Down to the Nitty Gritty Part 2

If getting rid of Gabriel wasn’t difficult enough, since he was fighting me every step of the way, I had to deal with a second specter.  This one appeared in the guise of an old Chinese man.  Since he had a gray ghost, he died peacefully, of old age. 

Apparently the Chinese gentleman had been the Landgraabs’ gardener, and maintained the hordes of flowers surrounding the estate.  But he wouldn’t go peacefully either.  Indeed, when I even made the suggestion to go on to the afterlife, he scoffed at me and tried to lunge for me.

So, I had no other choice.

I don’t mind being surrounded by specters from the afterlife, but others don’t feel the same way, especially not slick pols running for mayor of Sunset Valley.  So, I took out my Banshee Blaster.  He, too, decided to try to put up a fight.  But my Blaster was too strong and too powerful and he got sucked in.

The Landgraab mansion wasn’t my last stop for the evening – merely my first.  I was back at the Alto mansion, Noah’s place.  The story is that the Landgraabs and the Altos were supposed to be big rivals – but apparently that happened in my grandmother’s time.  Then, Noah’s mother, Holly Alto, decided to go artistic and hook up with my dad – oh, that’s another story for another time.

I’ve been to this mansion before for my job, but to expel spirits.  This was an actual ghost invasion.  There was no wonder, it seemed, that Noah and Sadie were never home.  It couldn’t have been too comfortable. 

Again, I hit the entrance foyer first.  In the Alto mansion, the entrance connects to the kitchen, and Neil’s bedroom is off to one side. 

I looked around and there was a strange looking purple ghost.  I knew he had also starved to death.

A closer look revealed him to be dressed in medieval garb!  No matter, he had to be zapped back to the fourteenth century.